Overwhelmed

I failed to mention on Wednesday for lunch I tried octopus. That day I was talking to the dad by the pantry, and he whipped out a normal, little cardboard box, and he asked if I had ever tried octopus. I was flabbergasted because that was the last thing I expected to be in a box, but a metal can was inside, so that made more sense. Anyway the kids love it, and I tried a piece. I thought it would be fish texture, but it is like meat texture, and it’s ok, not amazing, but hey, I ate octopus!

Yesterday, I went and saw Jerome, which was nice as always. We even went out for lunch at this nearby sushi place called Sushi Love. As I have said before, sushi is not as great as in America because we offer a lot of special rolls, and it is cheaper. The rolls here are more simple, so boring, but Sushi Love was pretty good for France standards. It was a cute restaurant.

Today I have to take the train with the dad to Paris because we are sharing a car. I probably won’t post this to the afternoon, but I am not sure if I am expected to sit with him or not. I just listen to music, read, and sleep during the trains, so I wouldn’t be much of a conversationalist anyway. Anyway this will be kinda awkward, but I never feel completely at ease here. I am annoyed because I can’t take an earlier train to actually get to class on time, I will be 15 mins late, which is ok, but then I can’t meet anyone before class starts, and I have no friends in my class yet.

I am glad today is Friday. I am kinda exhausted from this week. I hate waking up at 6:30am, it sucks. Why can’t the boy set an alarm and wake himself up? It is not necessary for me to wake him up uhg. Some of my au pair friends aren’t even on duty until the afternoon and don’t have to take the kids to school in the morning, so lucky. I only get like 6-7 hours of sleep every night, which isn’t healthy at all. And the weekends it isn’t much better because I wake up early when Jerome does for work, and sometimes don’t go back to sleep, and then Saturday, we go out, so I don’t sleep then either.

I have been looking into French schools recently, as you know, but I have kinda forgotten the visa part, which requires one to go through CampusFrance.org. A shit site if you ask me. It took me forever to figure out how to begin all the shit I have to do for this site, and when I did figure it out: it’s a lot of shit. Gahhh. A ton of translated stuff needs to be posted on there (official translations=expensive and timely). I am overwhelmed. The only two public schools with Intl Business are apparently really hard to get into Jerome told me, so that doesn’t boost my spirits, and then he told me to look into Nice, and so far, I have only found one public university with that program, and I am pretty sure that’s it. There’s just slim pickings for public schools with business; they’re all private, there’s a ton of those. So I am just concerned about all this, and NO ONE WILL RESPOND TO MY EMAILS. French bastards uhg. I even send them in French…

I am just really worried about all of this. Becoming an au pair was hard, but in retrospect easy because I had someone tell me what I needed to do, but now, it is all up to me, and no one is helping me at all. I don’t have anyone to ask advice too either. I don’t know anyone who has been in a similar situation as me.

Well I am sounding sad right now. I am just OVERWHELMED.

Update:

I am all fancy with my italics.

Anyway its a no go for school today. I read on the train website that there'd be delays for my train, so me and the dad discussed a while about what to do. He said it was up to me to take the train at 9:30 (or whenever it got there), so I eventually said I will just stay here. I feel guilty, but he said it was ok to do every once in a while, and that I don't stay in a lot anyways (I don't know if this fact bothers him? But I did last semester, usually it was like half and half in Mondays whether I stayed in or not). So I am staying home today. Gonna watch some Breaking Bad first things first. Then look more into CampsFrance.org crap and maybe, who knows, I will get my butt up and run. He also said I never jog anymore, which I know is bad, but kinda weird he mentioned it?

Anyway I am happy to relax. I can't believe I didnt really enjoy my week of Paris doing nothing bc I like it now. It is good to have a mix though. Being busy all the time or bored all the time is tiring it their own ways.